BarkingProse

Long before Nellie crossed the bridge, mom talked to us about what happens to our bodies when we don’t need them anymore.

Mom explained that once our spirits cross the bridge, our days of wearing fur are over. She said our bodies would then be cremated in a respectful ceremony and our ashes would be saved.

Mom promised Nellie that her sacred ashes would return to Asherpark. She showed me and Nellie the beautiful urn she got special from her friend Julie at Julie Reisner Ceramics.

Nellie thought that was the best thing in the whole world. While her spirit was romping with Codie on the other side of the bridge, her ashes would always have a home at Asherpark.

About a week after Nellie crossed the bridge, mom and dad went to the vet and collected Nellie’s ashes. The ashes were in a beautiful box with her name on it and there was a clay heart with Nellie’s paw print.

Us mutts were real curious about Nellie’s ashes. We thought they would smell like Nellie, but they didn’t have her scent.

Mom carefully transferred Nellie’s ashes from the box to the urn. We all stood around and watched, not sure how we were supposed to behave.

Then mom created a special place for Nellie. On a table near Nellie’s portrait, mom arranged the urn with Nellie’s sacred ashes, her collar, the foot print from her last night on earth, and cards from people who wrote to say good bye.

Mom said the circle was complete. Nellie came to us as a worn out stray. We took care of her and grew to love her. When it was time for Nellie to leave us, we helped her cross the bridge. Now her ashes are back home at Asherpark.

After Nellie died people wrote so many beautiful things about her. Nellie touched something in people. She was like a pure white light of goodness and courage.

Me and mom sat quiet while we were thinking about Nellie. Mom says we will always remember Nellie and we will miss her forever, but we have to be ready for when another worn out mutt needs a safe place.

I looked at mom and we both knew that’s how we would honor Nellie. When the time is right another sorry old mutt will find a forever home at Asherpark. The magic of Asherpark will continue.

 

 
 

 

 

After Nellie joined our pack things felt balanced. There were two blue dogs, me and Nell. There were two old dogs, Nellie and Jack. Me and Tess were the two young dogs affectionately called the Evil Twins.

How we moved was balanced too. I travel at the speed of light. Tess runs a close second but can’t ever catch me. Jack will trot, but only when he thinks there’s something to eat. Nellie wobbled as fast as she could on her old worn out legs. She was the caboose to our train.

Nellie was always getting lost because she couldn’t keep up. As slow as mom tried to walk, it wasn’t slow enough. Nellie would look right, mom would move left, and quick as that Nellie was lost.

Mom got into the habit of walking our route twice, once to show us where we were supposed to go and a second time to fetch Nellie.

Nellie had an uncanny ability to get herself into hopeless situations. Once when she still moved pretty good, she wanted to sniff real close to the fence. She lost her footing and tumbled down a bank to where the fence met the ground. She got stuck on her back with her feet up in the air.

Mom searched for a long time before she figured out what happened to Nellie. Then it took her and dad together to pull Nellie out of the ditch and hand her up the hill to where she could stand on flat ground.

Tess thought the whole thing was hilarious. Jack went in the house and pretended it wasn’t happening. I was worried sick about Nellie. Funny thing is Nellie wasn’t upset at all. She was real grateful to be right side up, but never complained about being upside down in the ditch.

After her second vertigo attack, Nellie started getting lost in the house. She’d get stuck in a corner all wrapped up in lamp cords. She would stare at the mirror and wonder why everything looked backwards.

As Nellie got more and more confused, me and mom spent more time looking for her. Sometimes we found her stuck under a bed. Another time she wandered into the bathroom and the door closed behind her.

Tess has the best nose and could easily have found Nellie, but she didn’t want to get off the couch to help. Since I’m always with mom, we formed a Nellie search and rescue team.

Sometimes I’d be sniffing in the yard when I’d hear mom yell, “Where’s my baby?”

I’d come running to mom and together we’d look for Nellie. If we didn’t find her right away, mom would say, “Ash, find our baby!”

When we finally found Nellie, it was always the same. Mom would kneel down in front of Nellie, hold her head real gently and kiss her snout. Then she’d grin and say, “Here’s our baby!”

Nellie told me even though she was deaf she could hear what mom was saying. I asked Nellie what she heard when mom said “Here’s my baby!” Nellie laughed and said she heard love.

Last night me and mom took a walk together. We went down by the little barn where all the varmints hang out. We walked all around Asherpark and looked at the stars. Suddenly mom knelt down next to me and whispered in my ear, “Ash, where’s our baby?”

It wasn’t a question that required an answer. We both knew Nellie had crossed the bridge. We just want her back.

 

It feels like somebody ripped my heart out. Our sweet little Nellie got called across the bridge and we’re left here at Asherpark missing her terribly.

Mom told us the day would come when Nellie would have to leave us. There were so many close calls, we were lucky to have her as long as we did.

Nellie had three vertigo attacks. The last one put her in the hospital and then she couldn’t eat or drink on her own for two weeks.

After the vertigo Nellie had trouble walking. She stumbled and slipped trying to keep up with the rest of us. Her heart murmur was getting worse, and she had a lump on her chest that was growing fast.

While we worried how she felt or if she was in pain, Nellie took it all in stride. She told me she wanted to live as long as she could because the food was so yummie at Asherpark. Then she smiled real big so I would know she was joking.

One day Nellie lost her balance and fell face first into the flowers. I quick ran over to see if she was okay. Nellie slowly got her feet under her and stood up with some weeds hanging off her ear. She asked me if I’d sit with her in the shade so we could talk.

I was happy to do anything Nellie asked me, so we wandered off to a shady spot away from the other mutts. Pretty soon Nellie was talking up a storm.

“Ash, you’ve always had a good life,” Nellie said. “You were chosen as a puppy, brought to a loving home, fed good food, and cared for like you were a prince.”

“It wasn’t like that for me,” Nellie said. “I had a person once. I think I was loved when I was little. Then something bad happened. I had to live outside and nobody paid any attention to me.”

“Were you scared, Nellie?” I asked.

“At first I was, but then I kinda gave up and got used to being ignored.” Nellie said.

For a while Nellie was quiet. She looked at her paws with the swollen joints and lowered her head.

“Ash, the best thing that ever happened to me was getting lost. I got picked up as a stray, taken to a shelter, and told I was gonna die.” Nellie said

“But then your Codie came to me,” Nellie continued. “Codie told me my life would be spared and I would go to Asherpark. Codie said I would be incredibly happy at Asherpark.”

“Are you happy here with us at Asherpark?” I asked.

Nellie laughed and licked her paw. “I’m beyond happy, Ash. I wish I could live forever. I never want to leave Asherpark.”

Neither one of us knew what to say next. I knew in my heart that time was running out for Nellie. She knew it too.

Pretty soon Nellie straightened her head and looked at me with her beautiful soft face. I loved that she has one blue eye like me and one brown eye like Codie.

“Ash, when my time comes you have to promise to be brave. I want you to be right next to me when Codie comes to get me,” Nellie said.

“Nellie, I promise I will be with you to the very end,” I said.

Last Saturday it was time to keep my promise. Nellie had a seizure. We rushed her to the emergency room. The doctor said there was nothing we could do to save Nellie. It was time to let her go.

I stood real quiet in the room. I knew if I looked at Nellie I would burst into tears.

Nellie was the brave one. She thanked mom and dad for loving her and taking such good care of her. As the vet pushed the medicine into her IV line, Nellie winked at me. She whispered she would come back soon and tell me what it was like to cross the bridge with Codie as her guide. Then she was gone.

Her little body looked so peaceful, like she was sleeping. But no matter how hard we cried, she wouldn’t wake up. It was awful to walk out of the hospital and leave Nellie behind. It was a damn shame she couldn’t go home with us.

Good bye Nellie. I will never forget you. Never.