Journey

Alone

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Journey

Me and Mom didn’t sleep much the night Ash died. We kept vigil listening for the rattle of his tags or his big Woof! We didn’t talk. There was nothing that words could help.

When Ash died in June the nights were short. The sky turned light around 4AM so me and Mom got in the car and drove to the spot where Ash liked to swim. We threw pebbles into the river and wished Ash was there with us.

Soon we were both hungry. Mom drove to a coffee shop. She had some fancy coffee drink and we shared a ham and cheese croissant. It was delicious and not something that I got on a regular basis.

Back at Asherpark everything seemed too still. What was the point of me barking when there weren’t any other dogs to hear me?

Before I came to Asherpark there had been as many as five dogs – Ash, his girlfriend Tess and a collection of throw away dogs that nobody else wanted. I wish I had known all those dogs. It would have been so fun to be part of a big pack, especially when some poor delivery guy came to the front door.

Mom decided she would mow the lawn. It’s one of her favorite things to do. She calls it her useful meditation – riding the mower up and down the big patches of grass. I wandered off in search of a distraction – anything to help me stop missing Ash so much.

How was I going to fill each day? Mom spent as much time with me as she could, but I knew I had to learn to become more independent. When Ash was alive I would go find him if I got bored and he would take me on an adventure. Now I had to create my own adventure.

As I was staring at nothing I felt movement. I looked all around and didn’t see anyone or anything. But there it was again. It felt like the earth was vibrating. I was starting to get creeped out when it came to me – there was some critter in the ground right under my feet. I started digging like a maniac. Dirt flew in all directions. I was gasping for breath as I shoved my nose into the hole I just made and there it was – a soft, warm, fuzzy, disgusting little mole that tasted like rotten garbage.

The mole was absolutely still as he dangled in my mouth. Before I could think through what to do next,  he squirmed and I spit him out. Oh the relief of having that nasty little beast out of my mouth. But he made a critical mistake – as he was disappearing down the hole I had just dug he couldn’t resist dissing me.

“HaHa, catch me if you can….See ya’ later pretty face!”

Oh I’ll catch you, you little jerk. If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll catch you. And that’s how I decided to become a mole hunter extraordinaire.

Journey

 

Journey, Uncategorized

His Last Words

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Ash

I had two wonderful years with Ash. He raised me from a little squirt and was so proud when I graduated from my last training class. We celebrated by playing a game of bump and run and had a cup of doggie ice cream.

Our last summer together was magical. Road trips, hikes, the swimming hole, visits with friends, life was full of fun and adventure. Up at sunrise, wolf down our breakfast, then run the fence line to check on the alpacas.

I marveled at how the alpacas behaved when Ash was around. All he had to do was give them the stink eye and they would shuffle off minding their manners. The alpacas didn’t respect me and if Ash wasn’t close by they would spit at me and threaten to stomp me. That made Ash furious and he chased them off with a stern warning.

It’s hard for me to talk about losing Ash. He woke up sick one day. Mom rushed him to the emergency hospital where they did an ultrasound and found he was suffering from hemangiosarcoma, a horrible cancer that is almost always fatal. Hemangiosarcoma in Dogs

I still remember the shock when Mom told me Ash was going to die.

“No, No, No!” I sobbed. “Not Ash! How will we live without Ash?”

As sick as he was Ash spent the last two days of his life trying to comfort me and his people. Ash didn’t have much energy but he greeted everyone who came to the house. Friends came to pay their respects and say good-bye. People sat around and told silly stories about Ash and how he made friends with everyone he met. There were lots of tears and hugs. Everyone left with a lick from Ash.

On the last day that Ash was in this world I lay next to him on his blanket. He told me everything would be all right once we got over the pain of losing him. He said I would live a long and happy life at Asherpark. It would be my responsibility to bring joy and laughter to people and help other dogs find their way in life. His last words still echo in my soul:

“Be brave, Journey, and love life. For every heartache there will be joy. You will always have me in your heart. No one can take that away from you.”

And then he was gone, running wild on the other side of this life, making new friends, chasing another adventure. Oh Ash, I miss you so much!

Journey and Ash

Journey

Remembering Ash

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Ash and Journey

Ash was my hero and role model. Whatever he did I copied. It was a sign of respect and it’s also how we dogs learn from each other. When you’re a pup you need a good example to look up to. Ash was everything to me.

I’ve been trying to write this Bark for the last three days. I can’t seem to get past the first paragraph. I want to tell about all the wonderful things me and Ash did together. Chasing rabbits, barking at the neighbor dog, swimming in the river, long hikes with Mom. That’s all great stuff but it doesn’t have a happy ending.

Mom says I can leave out the ending for this Bark and maybe write about it later, but everything is connected in my head. The more I remember how much I loved Ash, the more it makes me miss him. I can’t seem to separate the two.

Ash had lots of nicknames. My favorite was “Flyboy” because he could sail through the air like a big bird. He could catch any ball that was remotely close to him. He could pirouette and spin and land light as a feather on his feet.

Mom liked to call him “Magellan” because he was always escaping the fenced yard to go on an adventure. Sometimes he’d come home covered in brambles and bleeding from the blackberry vines. Mom would scold him and he’d just laugh and wink at me. Then Mom would laugh and we’d roll around on the ground together and be silly.

Over time I noticed that Ash didn’t want to play bump and run as much. Mom noticed it too. She took Ash to the vet. They checked him out an couldn’t find anything wrong with him. He’d have days where he was his old self and then he wouldn’t want to run or play for a day or two. We were all worried about him but Ash said everything was okay.

I wonder if he knew how sick he was but didn’t want us to worry. Or did his life just slowly start to slip away. He was ten years old. He’d used his body hard. But ten is young. I’m ten and hoping to live a lot more years.

I’ll write more about the last weeks that we had with Ash, but right now I don’t have the heart for it. Instead I’m going to post some pictures of Ash that are sure to make you smile. It’s what Ash would want. Live, love, laugh and leave ’em smiling.

Ash

Ash

Ash