Chaos

September 1, 2013
By
Ash Up Close

Ash

It ain’t been easy for our mom the past few months. Us mutts have been driving her crazy. Me and Tess and Jack should be helping her but instead we’re giving her fits.

Everybody knows that Tess has been terrible since the California girls arrived. She’s got this mad-on for Shiloh and tries to kill Shiloh every chance she gets.

Mom says that Tess can’t be trusted around Shiloh. That’s wrong. You absolutely can trust Tess to pick a fight with Shiloh.

Jack’s getting older and maybe a little slow minded. He’s taken to showering the couch every morning even if mom lets him out right away to do his business. Our friends help mom find the other places that Jack has pissed. Yesterday it was the door into the master bedroom. This morning it was the guest bathroom.

When we first got Jack through Old Dog Haven, he marked the whole house. Funny thing is mom never saw him do it. She tried everything to catch him in the act, but he’s so stealthy nobody but me ever sees him do it.

Mom washes the rugs and sprays some kinda miracle solution everywhere, but you can still smell Jack. Personally, I love the fragrance of dried piss – mom, not so much.

Okay, so I’ve been ratting out Tess and Jack. Now I gotta confess what I’m doing to make mom crazy. I’m back to my adventures in the ravine. We had a lot of rabbits this year that made tiny little tunnels under the fence. Turns out it’s not that hard to enlarge their tunnels and Voila! I’m on the other side of the fence.

It’s not like I won’t come back, but mom knows there’s all sorts of trouble I can find in the ravine. I know we got raccoons, coyotes, possum, and maybe bobcats. Mom thinks I’m dumb enough to introduce myself to these neighbors, kinda like a rich kid trying to say hi to the gangsters in the ghetto. I’m not sure I’d do that but I can’t say for sure I wouldn’t. Last night the coyotes were having a howl fest and I sure felt like joining them.

One time I dug out on a side of the fence with no gates. It was a pretty tight squeeze. When I got to the other side I realized I couldn’t get back under the fence. We had some visitors who thought it was hilarious. One of the ladies did search and rescue stuff and suggested mom grab a shovel and dig me a return tunnel. The guys thought that was too much work and dragged me back under the fence. Whew! I was a little scratched up but sure had a good time while I was loose.

With all this chaos you’d think maybe the new girls would start acting up. Nope! They’re the best dogs in the pack. They don’t bark and carry on, they never have accidents in the house, and they try real hard to get along with everybody. I love hanging out with them. You know what? I think Mama has a crush on me.

The girls are gaining weight and confidence. A couple of days ago Shiloh invited me to play. That was so cool. I did my whirling dervish and almost knocked her over. Once in a while Shiloh swipes my ball. It’s okay. That sorry little mutt never had much of a chance to play and be happy. She can have my squeaky ball anytime.

So much for true confessions. It’s mom’s birthday today and us mutts are gonna help her celebrate. We got company coming and special treats. Maybe mom will take us all down to see the alpacas. We’re gonna have a fun day. Woof!

 

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