Lost In Place

October 28, 2011


I always thought I was of average intelligence for an Australian Shepherd. I was smart enough to stay alive for many years. But now I’m not so sure.

When I went to see the eye doctor she told mom I have some cognitive dysfunction. Well who wouldn’t? I’m totally deaf and really can’t see much at all. My head sits crooked with my good eye pointed down at the ground. You try walking around like that and see how good your cogs function.

Mom noticed I get confused by reflections. I try to walk into the mirror and through the glass door. Maybe we didn’t have mirrors where I used to live.

Yesterday I got to feeling really down. If mom turns right and I look left, I lose sight of her. I usually walk in the wrong direction and she has to chase me down. When she taps me on my butt I still can’t find her. She’s started carrying a feather duster so she can reach me quicker. It tickles, but I don’t mind.

At night I walk around in circles. Each time I spot mom on the couch I wag my butt and smile at her. She signals for me to come see her, so I walk right up to her for some special pets.

Pretty soon I start my circles again. When I come back to mom it’s like I’m seeing her for the first time. Maybe having a good memory isn’t always that important. Maybe all you have to remember in this world is who loves you.

I may not know how to navigate through the mirror but I know how to find love. You start by letting people touch your heart. Then when you get lost they come find you. It’s kinda like you’re lost in the right place. I know I’m lost right where I want to be.

5 Responses to “ Lost In Place ”

  1. liz on October 29, 2011 at 12:15 pm

    oh nellie
    we are all a little bit crooked…
    and walking the circle is like walking the labrynith..the circle is an elemental shape, the moon, the earth…the sun..
    there are all kinds of smarts and you have the intelligence of the heart. and home is where the heart is.

  2. Nellie on October 29, 2011 at 6:09 pm

    Liz, you wrote to me. I’m so excited. Yes, yes. Walking in circles is very like walking the labrynth. I love the earth, the moon, the sun. I am so happy with my new life. AND, I got a new haircut and kerchief. Everyone says I look quite fetching. Please write to me again. Your new pal, Nellie

  3. liz on October 30, 2011 at 1:26 pm

    hi Nellie
    thanks for writing back!
    circles are a feminine shape and i bet you are quite the fashion statement with your new do and your scarf.
    think of all the great women who wore scarves-audrey hepburn, jackie O…
    i hope that on halloween you and Jack and tess and asher get to sit out under the moon
    and have treats while the humans drink hot cider and carve jack-o-lanterns in shape of smiling aussie dogs.wish i could be there.

  4. Nellie on October 31, 2011 at 7:01 am

    Liz, this is so fun. I never had a long distance friend before. Well, tonight is the big night. Goblins and costumes. My scarf has spider webs and witches on it. I want to be like Grace Kelly. Did she wear a scarf? If it doesn’t rain we will have our fire and howl at the moon. We’ll do a special howl for you. Let me know if you hear it. Please come see us. Your friend, Nellie

  5. liz on November 13, 2011 at 11:54 pm

    hi nellie (and jack and asher and tess and kev and bob)
    you know, i think i may have heard that special howl on halloween
    …and i don’t think it was the 1930’s London of Werewolf movie i was watching on netflix..i think it must have been my special pals..
    thanks for sending it my way

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