BarkingProse

When I don’t get my way, I tend to sulk. Mom says I have the most expressive face of all us dogs and I use it to my advantage.

I can’t remember what had me looking so unhappy in this picture, but I did everything short of weeping in my hanky to impress upon everyone how miserable I was at the moment.

I know at times my selfish behavior makes mom plenty upset. I am selfish when it comes to attention. But in other ways I am the best dog a person could ever have.

You know those old expressions like two sides to every coin and double edged sword. That’s me. Just like my harlequin face, my nature is split right down the middle. My biggest weaknesses are also my greatest strengths.

I have been known to pick a fight with other dogs when they were disrespectful to me. Sometimes people who don’t now me are scared of my big bark.

On the other hand I am totally devoted to my people and my pack. When a guest dog attacked Jack, I dove right in and saved Jack. When another guest dog got too close to the alpacas, I got in between and growled him back.

Mom says I would die to save my people. It’s true. In some ways I am totally fearless. If I feel my people are in danger I will fight to the death. Mom is never afraid to be alone in our house. She knows I would let her know if there was trouble.

When I’m the only dog I do anything people ask of me. I snuggle up close and lie real still if the people want to watch TV or read the newspaper.

Want to go for a walk? I’m your girl. I have good leash manners and am happy to sniff wherever the people take me.

If you hand me a treat you will never feel my lips or teeth as I gently take it from your fingers. I’m not like Ash who tries to swallow the hand that feeds him.

So why am I telling you this? It’s because I’ve decided it’s time for me to find a new home.

I’ve lived at Asherpark for more than four years. I’ve learned how to play, and trust, and mind my manners. I’ve had romps with Ash and long walks in the woods. I love my life at Asherpark, but I’m ready to have my own person.

Mom and I have talked it over and she agrees. I would be happiest as the only dog in a house with no other pets. I want to be devoted to people who just pay attention to me.

I don’t want to have to be nice to the throw away dogs mom drags home. I don’t want to share the couch with other dogs. I don’t want to be one of several dogs. I want to be the only dog.

If I can find the right person who will love me and treat me nice, I would devote the rest of my life to making that person happy.

All I want is a chance to be the only one. In exchange I will love my new people with everything in me. I might be a princess, but I’m also the most loyal, fearless, devoted dog you will ever meet.

 

 

If you’re wondering how come we don’t bark much at Asherpark anymore, you don’t have to look any farther than my big smiling face. It’s a long story, but basically me and mom are locked in a battle over who runs our pack.

I’ve been through all kinds of training. I’m part border collie so it’s not for lack of intelligence that I’m a problem. Mom has spent hours working with me. I’ve learned to leave the hens alone and not chase the alpacas. I come when I’m called and walk real nicely on a leash.

Once I snuck out the front gate when it was open. The automatic gate closed behind me and I couldn’t get back to the house. I lay down by the gate and waited a long time until Ash got somebody to let me back in.

Here’s the rub. I’m a diva and I have to be the center of attention. If mom is petting Jack, I push between them so she’ll pet me instead. If people are ignoring me, I pester them until they turn their attention to me.

When it was just me and Ash, everything was fine. Ash likes to do his own thing and doesn’t care if I get most of the attention. But then mom got this stupid idea to bring homeless mutts into our pack. It’s disgusting the dogs she has brought home.

Darcy was the first mongrel. Old, fat, smelly and not terribly bright. I thought to myself, “Why bother?” I tolerated him because he was so pathetic.

Next came Jack straight out of the joint. He was crazy in the head after months of confinement. He made himself at home by pissing on every surface in the house. Mom hated the smell. I thought it was funny. A couple of times me and Ash marked over Jack’s mark. That sure made mom mad!

One day mom came home with a bag of urine soaked fur. She got the hideous fur ball from the shelter just before the ragged mutt was to be put down. Mom named the fur ball Nellie and treated her like a princess. I would have objected but Nellie was so fragile I couldn’t bring myself to be mean to her. I did, however, prevent Nellie from getting on my couch.

Ash loved Nellie and so did everyone else who met her. Even I sensed there was something very special about Nellie. We had Nellie for almost two years before mom had to let her go.

We were back to us three house mutts, me, Ash and Jack, when I heard mom talking about two Aussie mix dogs who had been starved nearly to death. It was a mother-daughter duo. Mom kept looking at this video clip that showed the two dogs right after they were rescued. I have to admit I’d never seen such frightened skinny dogs.

One night I heard mom talking to Ash. “Should we bring the girls to Asherpark?” she asked.

“We gotta take them,” Ash said. “That’s what we do at Asherpark.”

I was just about to say I didn’t want anymore throw away dogs, but the look from Ash silenced me.

“What do you think, Tess?” mom asked.

“I don’t much care one way or the other,” I said.

Three weeks later two of the most forlorn looking mutts showed up at our doorstep. That’s when our world changed.

I’ll tell you more tomorrow, but I’m busy right now being the center of my own universe. I’ve got some new friends who think I’m the cat’s meow. MEOW!!